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A Terrifying Tale of 3-D Gravity; Hold On!

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A screen shot of the Gravity preview, ticket stub, and real 3-D glasses w/bag that they came in. PHALL PHOTO 2013

A screen shot of the Gravity preview, ticket stub, and real gorgeous 3-D glasses w/bag that they came in.
PHALL PHOTO 2013

You can take the “Gravity” movie review shortcut; it was a great movie, go see it. Or you can take the long way, like I did. I have enjoyed watching Sandra Bullock age gracefully, and become a better actress over the years. There were a couple fluff movies, but I still watched them to get another sample of her wonderful humor. Nothing like a stressed out Sandra.

Then there’s George Clooney. I have just plain enjoyed watching him. And he is also great to just watch, cinematically speaking. Some of his movies were not so great, but they could easily be made better by cutting everything except George out of the movie…so I could just watch him. Okay, I’m over that for now.

The closest movie theater to Westport, Washington is a 40-mile round trip. It was an arduous trip, because the sun was setting behind me all the way. I kept getting glimpses of the spectacular color show in my rear-view mirror. I’d slow down and look longingly at my camera in the seat next to me, and then at the clock, which nagged me to put my foot back on the gas. Luckily the traffic was light and my frequent gas vs brake battle didn’t risk any lives. By the time I got to the theater, the nature show was over, but I did get this shot of the moon.

Moon over South Shore Mall, Aberdeen, WA PHALL PHOTO 2013

Moon over South Shore Mall, Aberdeen, WA
PHALL PHOTO 2013

I should tell you that I haven’t been to a movie theater in…not sure, but a very long time. Movies just aren’t in my budget, and I can see why. Ticket + popcorn + drink=$22.50! I really wanted M&M’s to go with my popcorn, but that was another $3 or $4. I don’t mean to sound cheap, but think of all the gas I could buy with that money. Okay, bad comparison.

Another thing I rarely experience are malls. I’m just not a shopper. (Paul was, but don’t tell him I said so.) When I walked through the entrance I was immediately lost. I had to ask a couple of girls, that were hanging out in a beauty shop, where the theater was. As I walked further and further into that deserted retail tomb, I considered leaving bread crumbs to find my way back to the entrance when the movie was over. Later you’ll see why even bread crumbs wouldn’t have helped.

I paid my pretty penny, grabbed my grub and went down a hallway to door #5. Some pre-movie, pre-preview nonsense was playing when I entered. Sheesh! I had the whole place to myself. I picked a lovely seat in the center and waited. A middle-aged couple shyly peeked in, and I welcomed them to my private showing, and generously invited them to chose any seat they wanted. They laughed, even if you didn’t. As three more couples joined us, we all joked about how empty the place was.

Okay, all the previews were over and I grabbed my hermetically sealed “real D 3-D” glasses (do not use for sunglasses). They fit perfectly :>) This was my first 3-D movie and I was a little nervous, and not just about the way the glasses looked either. I was also nervous about being scared spitless and maybe even screaming. And I was scared, but just a couple times, and no screaming. It was all worth it though. Did you know that 3-D makes you feel like George Clooney is, well, practically in your lap! ? I didn’t either. I’ll never give these glasses up. They are worth billions to me.

My George Clooney, I mean, 3-D glasses. PHALL PHOTO 2013

My George Clooney, I mean, 3-D glasses.
PHALL PHOTO 2013

Floating tears, I can’t say whose, looked as if they were floating in the air in my private screening room! In another scene a strap came loose and it began floating right out of the screen, right in front of me! What magical illusions! It all seemed so real, that when space debris came flying at me at a billion miles an hour, I actually flinched! I think I got whiplash.

The movie had an unbelievable, I do mean really unbelievable, story line, but I’d still recommend it. I love a strong, brave-woman-movie, I love space, and, I probably haven’t mentioned it, but I love George Clooney. The movie is also shown at theaters, without the 3-D, but why?

Now, back to the bread crumbs. When I walked out of the theater and turned right (I remembered that much), there was a fence/barricade across the wide hallway that should have led me back to the main part of the mall. I had it all figured out: right, right, left. Nope, not gonna happen. Mall closed for the night. See how the bread crumb idea was a wash? My only choice was to turn around and go out the back way. Into the dark.

I stepped out of the large doorway and was completely disoriented. (Huh, just like when I stepped in.) The few people in the parking lot were getting into their cars, and I was too embarrassed to ask which way the front entrance was. I followed the sidewalk to the right for a couple of minutes, but it just didn’t feel like the way to the front of the mall. So, I casually turned around and walked the other way. It was a very long walk and it was dark, except for a few widely spaced flood lights on tall poles. A bicycler whizzed by. That was weird. None of the theater goers drove by. That was weirder. I practiced holding my ignition key like a weapon. I hummed a little tune. I looked behind me, and in all the building nooks and crannies (surprisingly, there were many places for scary people to hide). Then the damn flood lights went out! I am so not kidding.

It was completely dark and I still had not made it to the front of the mall. All I could do was to keep walking. Why didn’t I even have a flash of a thought about the cell phone in my purse? I could have called someone and told them what a silly scary-movie character I had become. I finally made it to my truck and refrained from kissing it.

Ask anyone, I used to be street smart. I think that I’m off movie theaters and malls for awhile. I wonder if Netflix has any 3-D George Clooney movies? Back to the beach cave for me.

I should have gone with  my cousin.

I didn’t mean to call this a movie review up there in the first line. We both know that is isn’t, but I hope you at least get a smile out of it.

Author: Patti Hall

Writer, daughter, sister, mom, niece, grani, and friend. Works-in-progress; 3 children's books, some poetry and a memoir series, "Souvenirs from My Heart." Pursuits of happiness include gardening, walking the beach, reading, writing, photography, traveling and genealogy. I am a widow (2009), lost my sis in 2012, my aunt and a precious grandson in 2013.

24 thoughts on “A Terrifying Tale of 3-D Gravity; Hold On!

  1. Why did you get so disoriented? Was it the 3-D thing? That would scare me so much!

  2. What a fun post! I cannot believe they turned out the lights while you were still looking for your truck! I really, really like George Clooney and I really like Sandra Bullock and I can’t wait to watch this movie. Thanks Patti:)

  3. Awesome review Patti! I did have to chuckle at some of your experiences. That is a long way to have to travel to see a movie. I can see why you don’t do it often. Yeah, I figured out with popcorn and a drink I could have bought the Blu-ray for some of these movies. *sigh* I try to limit the popcorn and such now.

  4. They show 3-d movies as regular movies for people like me perhaps?? One eyed………….3-d movies are such a disappointment to me, especially when I was a teen. Anyway, that was a great description of a piece of your life and so enjoyable! Thanks………..btw, I wont be going to the movie.

  5. What a fun post Patti. I’d offer to escort you next time but think it may be a bit crowded with George Clooney in your lap and poor Sandra Bullock desperate to get out of mine. It’s 40 odd years since I went to the cinema so I’d probably get lost in one of these new Multi Screen places and end up seeing the wrong picture.
    Glad you got back to your car safely.
    xxx Huge Hugs xxx

  6. Thanks for giving us a vicarious experience, Patti. You can take a “short-cut” on your next theatre excursion: import contraband popcorn like we do. Shhhhh!

  7. That was great, Patti! So sweet hearing about your first 3D experience. After living in the heart of Hollywood, California for 18 years, I love driving to our local mall and watching movies the way the REST of America watches them. My husband and I had to be the “first kids on our block” to see Gravity, so we went early this week. Loved it, and recommend it highly! Brave on, Patti!

    • Thank you, Susan! I know I’m behind the times. I don’t own a tv either. Funny how a big adventure for me is an every day occurrence for many or most:>)
      Glad you are here.

  8. Our nearest regular (not drive-in) movie is about 25 miles away. We call that “right around the corner.” Gravity is our “next up” film to watch. We’ll be down on the cape all next week, so maybe, should be have a rainy afternoon, we’ll catch the film. There seems to be a positive consensus on this one.

    • Yes, I read one middle of the road review, but everyone else has said good things. It is different than anything that I have ever seen…let me know what you think and happy cape escape:>)

  9. I love how you take me there with you, take the whole experience of going to a movie into yourself, and become part of it. Movies aren’t fun for me because of my hearing (despite captions). Movies are noisy and my ears can’t separate out all the sounds so my body wants to run. But I used to love movies and Netflix, and I love going to the movies with you and feeling myself there. You have lost so much in recent years, but throw yourself wholeheartedly into life. You are the star of your own personal movie. Bravo!

    • What a great way to start my day. My friend, Greg, has the same issues with sounds. He has hearing aids, but still doesn’t hear well and he can’t filter sounds.
      It was the day of my aunt’s funeral in Ohio and I wanted a giant distraction. I knew a movie and writing about it would do the trick.
      Thank you for the wonderful comment and for announcing my stardom:>)
      You are well into your day, but have a great one.
      Hugs,
      Patti

  10. I was smiling through your whole post. You tell a great story! We haven’t seen Gravity yet. We’re waiting (hoping) it will show at the iMax theater in town. After reading this, I’m really looking forward to it: George Clooney, 3-D at an iMax. Sounds like heaven 🙂

  11. I was laughing in my head during this entire story. I am so impressed you went to a movie by yourself. I completely identified with your disorientation and disdain for malls. I search for my car after every trip to the grocery store. And I fill my purse with goodies before the movie. I buy their pop and popcorn though.

    • Glad to give you a giggle. When I finally found my truck it was all alone in this humongous parking lot! I have always gone to movies alone, but not in unknown theaters in unknown malls. Those costs make it hard to be honest.

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