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Transitions

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The greenhouse and garden, Eagle River, AK PHALL PHOTO 2014

The greenhouse and garden, Eagle River, AK
PHALL PHOTO 2014

Almost SIX weeks, and you know what I’m talking about. But I don’t want to make a big deal about it. Well, okay, I do want to make a big deal about it. Just give me a paragraph or three and then I’ll shut up about it. At least for today. More than anything, I feel that giving up cigarettes (and the caffeine addiction) has given me more freedom. The biggest freedom, is the freedom to go after a healthier life style.

No matter how many times that I have attempted to quit in the past, I always remained a slave to cigarettes. Even if I went as long as eight months without one single drag off one single cigarette, I was still chained to the addiction. I thought about the lack of them, more than I thought about anything else. Secretly (and probably outwardly) the drama was intense. It went on almost every waking moment that I didn’t smoke. “Should I? Could I? I can’t. I won’t! Damn, I’m weak. Man, I’m strong. I can’t go one more minute. If I can make it one more hour, I can go to sleep.”Β The internal drama was intense, as I’m sure the external was. Poor family.

This time no one suffered; not me and not my parents. That’s how I knew that the addiction was broken. For awhile, I waited for the other shoe to drop. As hours, days and then weeks passed (6 of them!), I kept waiting for that slam/slap on the shoulder and a rousting voice saying, “Fooled ya! You are about to have the worst withdrawals in the history of cigarette/caffeine withdrawals!” It never came. One of my reasons for diet and exercise, was to head off any shoe-dropping slam/slap on the shoulder. If it came, I’d be ready with a healthy routine and a new excitement for living without the chains of addiction. So far, so good.

It may very well be an illusion, or even a delusion, but I honestly think that I’m out of the woods, and that the damn shoe could never be thrown THIS far out! (Knock on wood, or whatever superstition will keep that big bad shoe away.)

On the home front. Mom goes to her first Physical Therapy session today. She has been moving less and I’m hoping that they will pick up the slack and get her into a good routine to further her recovery from the hip replacement. Dad is still fighting a painful-sounding cough. Hopefully, this last batch of meds will help him.

The best thing about the Olympics these past few weeks, has been watching mom and dad enjoy them together. Whether, mom was laying with her feet in dad’s lap, or sitting up and holding hands with him, I had the best seat in the house. They cheered and gasped in awe together at the inspiring wins, losses and injuries, while I just smiled at the two of them.

The low carb diet is going well. Really. Today will be day 5 of my crazy idea of joining a gym…wait, that was mom’s crazy idea. I’m a little sore, but it has been fun. I kind of earned another free pass by story-telling. Yep, the membership woman loved the story of Kevin and I, so much, that she promised more free passes for my future visits. Cool.

I just stepped out and took some shots of the light pastel pink and blue sunrise. It is a balmy 14 degrees this morn. I’ll share a few photos from yesterday, then I have to get ready for my next yoga class. Yikes.

P1020537 (1024x768)

Funny, I started writing this about the transition I will soon be dealing with; from living alone in Maggie (my cave at the beach) to living with my folks for the past 2 months in Alaska, to making a new life with Kevin in the foothills of the mountains. Somehow, I never got to that…maybe next time.

Peace,

Patti

PHALL PHOTO 2014

PHALL PHOTO 2014

Author: Patti Hall

Writer, daughter, sister, mom, niece, grani, and friend. Works-in-progress; 3 children's books, some poetry and a memoir series, "Souvenirs from My Heart." Pursuits of happiness include gardening, walking the beach, reading, writing, photography, traveling and genealogy. I am a widow (2009), lost my sis in 2012, my aunt and a precious grandson in 2013.

30 thoughts on “Transitions

  1. Such a hard thing to do – congratulations, Patti πŸ™‚

  2. Excellent πŸ™‚

  3. Your life has officially become An Adventure! A Romantic Adventure at that! Yay YOU. Such stories you have to tell.

  4. The sunrise was breath-taking. Yoga must be helping sustain your good habits as well as the special people in your life right now. Brava!

  5. Keep it up, Patti. I had a supervisor who smoked 3 packs a day. One day he decided he wanted to quit and he stopped cold turkey…that was 15 years ago.

  6. Huge Congratulations Sweetie. Giving up the weed is a fantastic achievement.The caffeine too. 6 weeks is remarkable.
    I hope the physio people can energise your Mom and the meds can help your Dad. You can have an even bigger smile on your face then.
    I love the photographs.
    Until we get the next stage of the story I send you Massive Hugs xxx

    • Wow, David. Thank you! I was just telling my mom about you, your new book, and how hilarious and kind you are. It looked like things are going well for you and I need to get back over to get caught up. Take care and thank you, again.

  7. I am impressed with your progress! I think it would be especially hard to give up smoking away from home but exercise does help everything. I can’t imagine being in Alaska in the winter. Let us know about the intriguing transition. Thanks for the recent visit to my blog.

    • It was good to get out to visit so many friends today. It was easier to quit, with care-giving and a non-smoking house. I was raised here until I was 17 and this is where most of my sibs and parents are…so here I am :>) My web feet would crack if I lived here. You are welcome for the visit and i hope I can get back soon.

  8. Interesting ENDING to a lovely and fascinating post. putting the link on my FB page.

  9. Cheers to you Patti, so proud of you!
    Sending you and your Mom and Dad a warm hug.

  10. This is all so wonderful, Patti! I’m betting that eating healthy/exercise is a big part of why you’ve been able to quit cigs/caffeine without much trouble. And, yea, yoga! I love yoga. The best classes help your mind as well as your body πŸ™‚ Hugs to you, your family, and Kevin!

  11. There will be a next time. You’re making sure of that. So glad when I see others get healthy and you inspire me to make myself a good soup. I smoked two packs a day when I was young. Quit on and off. In my 30s, I got bronchitis and coughed my guts out for two months. No cigarettes during that time. When I took a drag, the coughing started again. And I have never wanted another cigarette. It was hard to go the path of sickness, but at least I got rid of the cigarettes. Beautiful images, Patti. Thanks for sharing your life.

  12. So happy for the new you Patti! Blessed are you to have no withdrawls! Keep it up girl. πŸ™‚

  13. congratulations! it’s not easy to stay quit and so glad you are managing it

  14. Best seat in the house in deed. Your parents sound utterly charming! The fact that they’re still that much in love is so precious. God bless them!! As for you my dear, I can completely see that you will be my guardian angel. Let me explain. I’ve had a smoking habit for close to thirty years. But noticed I’m winded when I try to exert myself. Not to mention, I almost didn’t recover from bronchitis which turned to pleurisy and thankfully avoided pneumonia. The doctor warned me then that because I’m a smoker it was harder for my body to heal. Since reading about you quitting, I’ve given it a go…yes you inspired me. I’m not real strong and won’t make others suffer from me being a complete and utter b****. So I wouldn’t try cold turkey for fear of turning vile. I’ve begun by cutting back from one to 1 1/2 packs a day to ten. From ten I went to five after two days I went to two & now I’m down to one. After Sunday, I give up the cancer sticks for good. None a day. Pray that I’m able to do it as it’s definitely been rough on my family with the panic attacks and is especially hard when I’m having coffee. (Don’t know why but it feels rough then). I was having a hard day today when I seen your mountain picture on facebook and popped over to your blog. See what I mean about angel. Boy did I need to read your post!!! So thank you Patti for your strength which has helped me immensely!! Beautiful pics by the way as usual!!! πŸ˜‰

    • Oh, my. You almost made me cry. I went upstairs and read this beautiful and thoughtful comment to my folks and they were touched also. I have never been a guardian angel,but am happy to take on the job for you, with pleasure. I will be thinking of your efforts and cheering you on. I was smoking 3 packs a day, for 35+ years. You can do this.I wish I could give you more direct advise or support. Feel free to email or PM me on FB if you want a supportive friend. Hugs to you and yours!

  15. Dear Patti,
    I’ve never smoked, so I suppose I don’t know the challenge of trying to quit. As my husband always said, change is good. Sometimes I don’t wish to believe him. Sounds like you’re on the road less traveled at the moment. Embrace your path, and remember don’t worry about anything, pray about everything. Stay warm, and good luck.

    • Thank you, Sheree. I always enjoy a visit from you. I feel pretty lucky to have such wise friends (with wise husbands!) who are always great about cheering me on and supporting whatever my latest effort is. I hope you know that I am still cheering you on and am so glad that you are in good health these days πŸ™‚

  16. Your photos are absolutely Gorgeous (with a capital “G”)!!! I have to share how incredibly inspiring you are! With all the healthy choices you’ve implemented….you going cold turkey and feeling so good about it is further proof to me ( a smoker eek) that it truly is an individual choice. If one decides to do give up a bad habit…they are far more likely to succeed because it was “their” choice!!! You give me inspiration to try….you really do! Keep writing and I’ll keep reading and waiting for my brain to say “it’s your turn chicka” hehe! Hugs and Blessings!!!

    • Sending you lots of encouragement, chicka! πŸ™‚ Thank you for the compliments and for visiting again with such wonderful comments. 2 months on Tuesday and have not looked back. I’m always around, if you need extra encouragement. Hugsback:>)

      • Congratulations for your two months!! That is epic! Thank you so much Patti….I sense the day for me to take that epic leap is nearer than it ever has been…so I may very well take you up on offer of extra encouragement!! πŸ™‚ You’re awesome sweet and I do very much appreciate you!

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